keep calm & carry on

Assalamualaikum my dear blog, 

Yes, SPM is just around the corner. I'm so not ready to face music. Its creepy when I think about it and will be more creepy if it comes. Well, you know my future lies on SPM. I should have studied hard since the first day the school started. But I didn't and now I regret for wasting time doing those useless stuffs. How stupid I was? I didn't realize it and I never realize it even though I know that SPM is just a few month from now. Well, with just a few month left I hope I'm able to catch up everything. My second trial was a disaster too. I think my percentage will decrease and I'll be going down to the second place. Uhhh. Whatever. It doesn't matter anymore. SPM is what really matters now. I did study for Chemistry and Sejarah today but its not enough I'm going to continue after this. I really need to stay away from internet and TV.


 I need to be more cool after this since there are a lot of pressure around me. The tense I have when I study, those noisy sounds I heard outside of my bedroom is really stress me out. It could lead to unstable feeling and eventually could make me give up. Seriously, I can handle all of those pressure wisely. Everything that is going on in my life is just uncontrollable. I have no idea why does it happen now. The nearer to the SPM days, the more tense I'll be facing. And I have no idea why does it mix with a sorrow and lonely feelings inside of me. I get confused. My mind is distracted by those unwanted feelings. I really wish it will go away. There was a night that I cried so hard thinking about the mistakes that I have done in my entire life. I questioned all of my fate. And life becomes so hard after that. Nothing made sense to me anymore. I was hoping, like really really hoping that I can turn back time. I miss my old life. The time before he appeared was the best time of my life. There was no problem, no burden, and no sadness in my life. *sigh* I should not write about this. This is just too emotional. I guess I was just influenced by the drama on TV. Huhh. Hate this.




So I really wish I can do my very best in SPM. I will.  InsyAllah. I hope there will be nothing can stop me. What really matters for now is my future. I will never waste my life. NEVER EVER. I'll try to achieve all of my dreams. Please, pray for me. That's all. Bye!